The Past Can Sometimes Haunt You.

.....Once upon a time in the fair Barony of Dragon's Laire there was a reign of terror. A misguided Baroness sought to impose her iron will on a populace who had believed the lady to have been wronged. Of course there are lots of twists and turns to this story. There are lots of pieces not known to the general public. It was one of those tales where things got ugly and in the end the very fabric of the Barony was shredded to the point that no one could see how it could be knitted back together again.

.....I was involved with some of this story. When this misguided Baroness first took on the mantle of the Barony on her own lone shoulders I felt compassion for her, and the need to help her bear this burden. As time went on though, I watched how this Baroness began to grow desperate and grasping. At first I tried to discount her acts of childishness as railings against the wrongs done to her. As it continued though I began to be annoyed with what I saw and then downright angry when I saw how this person would use her perceived power to gain advantage for herself to the detriment of others, even extending to gains in our real world. She did things that truly amazed me in how extremely vile she would be towards certain members of the Barony. It was rather frightening at times.

.....The reign of terror came to an end eventually. It took a long time to rebuild the Barony. There was a time where we were almost busted back to a shire because we simply could not seem to get our act together and work with a set of leaders. It took a lot of patience and hard work by Their Excellencies Ralg and Tsuruko, as well as many people in the Barony itself, before we really could turn things around again.

.....But during the darkest days before the very end of the misguided Baroness, we gave her a new name. This name came from the name of a demon in the writings of H.P. Lovecraft. A demon of such evil that the simple mentioning of its name brought about the chance of it actually coming into existence nearby and destroying you with such fearsome intensity that you died of fright before your actual body died. In the Lovecraft stories this demon was sometimes referred to 'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named'. This name was transferred over to this Baroness and she herself took on the name of 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named'. It was half-jokingly applied to the misguided Baroness, but the name stuck and she is still sometimes called by this name even to this day.

.....Now why would I tell you all this story? Well, I was caught by surprise on Tuesday night at Fight Practice. THL K. pulled me aside upstairs and she was anxious about something. I am often used to being pulled aside by her for little discussions of this nature, so I didn't think anything of it at first. Then she got rather quiet and asked me, 'Who is this person, 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named'? A couple of the newer people came to me and asked me about it because they thought it might be me.'

.....To say I was startled by this would be an understatement. I was caught by a number of conflicting emotions at that moment. But then I noticed the look on her face. She was seriously worried. She had obviously heard something particularly nasty associated with this name and truly thought that this name was being applied to herself. I immediately reassured her that in no way was she connected with this name whatsoever. I was as sincere as I could possibly be and reassured her in no uncertain terms that she was not this person at all.

.....THL K. has been a lot of things. There have been times where I've been very angry with her for the things that she has said and done. But I can honestly say that at that moment on Tuesday I actually felt sorry for her and felt the need to be a friend to her for a change. She's come a long way over the past year. I am in no position to judge what kind of person she is inside herself. Is she a changed person? I don't know. But I can tell you honestly that she is nothing akin to 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named'.

.....It's amazing to me sometimes the grudges I hold inside without really realizing that they are there. It's like they camouflage in plain site until something triggers them into the full light of day. My one hope is that when I do recognize them for what they are that I waste no more time in tearing them apart and tossing them out on their ear as fast as I can. Life is way too short to expend the kind of energy it takes to store them long term grudges.

.....Must be a full moon week. The musings are out on full walkabout this week. :-)

.....Aaron / Arontius.